Yes, it’s almost the end of summer. Soon the days of lounging at the beach and surfing the waves will be gone. You do have a beach right? Never mind. I’ll give you the one I have in Hawaii in the form of Honolulu Hottie, a novelette about a surfer and a beautiful woman, and how she gets him it trouble but it’s OK because not only is she beautiful but she’s right and he’s wrong. It takes a while for the surfer to see things her way. But when he does, he’s totally cool with that. See? Everybody’s happy!
So mark your calendars! You can get Honolulu Hottie for free on Amazonon September 27 (Friday) until September 30 (Monday). Get it on your Kindle and read it at the beach, in your car, at your desk, whatever. It’ll take you to a future where Hawaii deals with rising sea levels and sly mega corporations.
A few novelette publications later, a friend refused to read and write a review for Bit Storm because he thought the Amazon marketing blurb was lame. Nothing freaks out a writer more than telling him despite hours of obsessing in front of a computer screen, the highest level of achievement is “meah.” So I tossed aside the 300 piece puzzle I was doing with my daughter—Daddy time is over sweetheart—and checked what was on Amazon. What I saw looked good:
As a highly paid, top-notch, software professional, Diff has it made. He wears black t-shirts and jeans to work, his co-worker is an AI (Artificial Intelligent machine), and he has time to play online games. All this and a girlfriend who games too.
But Diff’s easy life becomes complicated: the AI wants a pet cat, and a political antagonist named SickDevil has decided Diff is his new best friend. Neither problem is a show-stopper until SickDevil tries to prove his social Darwinism theories making Diff’s Halloween party not only a fight to the death, but a fight to the nano. [...]
I went back to twitter and promptly lambasted my critical friend for being lazy and if he didn’t want to read fiction about nanotechnology, AI machines, and a Halloween party, he should go back to reading whatever slew of YA girl angst books that forty-year-old software engineer dads in the Bay Area enjoy as a guilty pleasure.
He responded with this:
Given the importance of what they do, and the controversies that often surround them, and the violent people they sometimes confront, it is remarkable that in the history of this country only four active federal judges have been murdered.
Judge Raymond Fawcett has just become number five. [...]
This blurb is doing some different things. The sample came from John Grisham (The Racketeer), an author who sells an awesome number of books. The blurb’s opening uses italicsANDbold. Outside these typeface enhancements, I’m not sure it’s outright superior. It’s using a different angle to hook readers. However, I am suspicious of myself of being lazy when it comes to marketing so I took up the challenge and rewrote the blurb. I ended up liking it more so I used it on Amazon.
War is as natural as breathing to a society. To be unskilled at war is to cease to exist. Compassion is exercised only when risk is minimal. You wouldn’t put yourself at risk to save another because that would be irrational.
Successful societies are more skilled at war than compassion.
Diff admires and is annoyed by SickDevil, a skilled nanotechnology engineer who crashes game servers and pickets peace rallies for fun. SickDevil claims an AI (Artificially Intelligent machine) would concur with his philosophy. Diff agrees to let his employer’s AI run a simulation to prove SickDevil wrong so he can knock SickDevil down a peg and trash SickDevil’s internet reputation.
But SickDevil pulls a fast one: the simulation transforms into a virus that reprograms nano-technology to produce warlike societies that turns Diff’s Halloween party into a fight for survival.[...]
I then went back and apologized for accusing him of seeding his bookshelves of Math Algorithms and Python books with girl angst books. In the end, it was the the friendship bracelet that won him over. We hugged and went back to being friends.
Dear reader, if you haven’t rushed out to get your copy of Memory’s Victims, this article is for you.
Oh, how I work so hard for you. I think through thousands of ideas, write them down, and then throw out 999 of them. Then I write it, then I revise it maybe three times, and then find someone both awesome and authoritative to give me feedback whereupon I revise it another two to three times. Is it good enough yet? Did you buy the novelette that I slaved over for days? You haven’t? Sigh, OK. You haven’t clicked buy on Amazon? Still unsure? Alright, I’ll come up with something else…
…a book trailer. You know, those short films they play before the movie you’re going to see. The short film gives you a sample of the story so you get excited about the movie you’re not there to see… yet.
People like videos. And you don’t even have to “read.” I can make a “short” that tells you about the story in an entertaining way so you’ll buy the story. Just like the big movies. OK, dear reader. I’ll do that. Just for you. Here is my YouTube science fiction book channel!
I know how you like that I work hard for you. It’s what drives our relationship—producer to consumer. Author to reader. If you want to tell me what else you’d like, add a comment and I’ll see what I can do.
Have you ever had someone tell you “if you don’t like it here, then leave.” When the nation states of Earth get interstellar travel capabilities, that’s exactly what some do. Governments fund voyages by giant spacecraft which spend multiple generations traveling to Earth-like planets. Arcadie, a jewish boy grown up on a generation ship, is excited that his generation finish the half a millennia voyage, that they will create a home free from and out of reach of the problems they had on Earth. But fate rarely deals the hand you want.
“If Lancer Kind’s MEMORY’S VICTIMS doesn’t raise your hackles, you’d better have them checked.” ―Harry Turtledove
Memory’s Victims is available as a Kindle book. Here’s a cool video about the book: Memorys-Victims.m4v or you may view it on YouTube. If you wish to get a copy of the book, click here and you’ll go to Amazon.
The tag cloud on the right has more articles about Memory’s Victims.
Did you enjoy the 2009 Star Trek movie where JJ Abrams made his mark? Did you view the mark as a blemish or a crest? Review Why Trekkies hate the ’09 Star Trek movie to refresh the mind because science fiction pundits Lancer Kind and Hal Dace are going it again with this pre movie release special.
Hal, I was so excited to see a new Abrams Trek was coming out, I threw out all of my Babylon 5 figurines to make room for NuKirk and NuSpock.
You shouldn’t have done it Lancer. Not only is B5 director JM Straczynski going to bitch slap you, those B5 toys are going to be worth a lot more than some emo, Beiberesque, NuTrek plastic-shit.
Dude! Don’t talk that way. You know I was right to love the 2009 movie. This is what Wikipedia said about the last one. It outsold any previous Star Trek film! You’re sounding like a fuddy duddy.
Official screenings in the United States started at 7 pm on May 7, 2009, grossing $4 million on its opening day. By the end of the weekend, Star Trek had opened with $79,204,300, as well as $35,500,000 from other countries. Adjusted and unadjusted for inflation, it beat Star Trek: First Contact for the largest American opening for a Star Trek film. The film made US$8.5 million from its IMAX screenings, breaking The Dark Knight’s $6.3 million IMAX opening record. The film is the highest-grossing in the United States and Canada from the entire Star Trek film franchise, eclipsing The Voyage Home and Star Trek: The Motion Picture. Its opening weekend numbers alone outgross the entire individual runs of The Undiscovered Country, The Final Frontier, Insurrection and Nemesis. Star Trek ended its United States theatrical run on October 1, 2009, with a box office total of $257,730,019, which currently places it as the seventh highest-grossing film for 2009 behind The Hangover. The film grossed $127,764,536 in international markets, for a total worldwide gross of $385,494,555. While foreign grosses represent only 31% of the total box office receipts, executives of Paramount were happy with the international sales, as Star Trek historically was a movie franchise that never has been a big draw overseas.
I’m giving you a direct order: Lancer, to stick to writing books and leave the “what’s and what’s not Trek” to dyed in the wool Trekkies like myself.
Don’t be so Starfleet Command. Throw me a bone here. What’s going to go wrong in the next movie?
Throw you a bone? Hell, here’s a checklist of ‘em.
Star Fleet Command trusts Kirk’s judgement. (It’s cliche drama to fight with idiot boss.)
Romulans are lawful evil (to borrow a AD&D term): honorable, noble imperialists who’ll use torture that causes no permanent damage.
Convincing technobabble that doesn’t violate the laws of physics.
Uhurah sings a song.
That’s a good list and I agree that those points will be in any good Trek movie. Let’s talk predictions as to how the next film will do based on this list. This is Abrams second Trek movie. He’s probably heard plenty of bitching and I’m certain he’s bookmarked, and studied Why Trekkies hate the ’09 Star Trek movie. So he has a better chance of making more of the Starfleet Academy bumper sticker crowd happy. I really enjoyed the last movie although agree with you on several of your grievances. I differ in that I think the franchise needs to evolve as society does. I’m with you in that it’s a grave loss to screw up the science and violate internal consistency. And I also think more story telling of a utopian future would be interesting although harder to write but Abrams clearly isn’t interested.
I predict that since Trek11 (2009) did time travel, there will be none this time to avoid the audience tiring of that trick. I think Into Darkness will fail the first three checklist items and then come on strong for the next four, and finally Uhurah sings and Spock’ll do something Vulcan, putting the film at six out of eleven. I think this will allow the movie to be a great commercial success yet maintain most of the Trekkie fan base, thereby bringing fresh viewers into the Trek fold.
It’ll be Star Wars: nonstop action, no strategy, no thoughtful moments. I say the next film fails all of the tests. A complete 0.
How much money are you willing to bet that my prediction is closer than yours?
You sound like a confident man. Forget money. I want the B5 set rescued from the garbage and delivered to me if I win.
Print this handy checklist and take it with you to the theater. And each time the movie earns a check, stand up, flip open your cell phone and shout “beam me up Scotty!,” and the rest of the audience will applaud. If they don’t applaud, they didn’t read this blog and you don’t give a damn because they ain’t Trekkies.