Lancer Kind, Science Fiction author

Stimulants in print

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You ever have a Caveman Funk day?

10 February, 2013 (04:04) | Caveman Funk | By: Lancer Kind

CAVEMAN FUNKImagine your worst day so we can compare notes with Akiya, the main character in Caveman Funk. You’re a modern person (perhaps even post modern), have a loving family, and maybe even a fridge full of food to go with your beer. Akiya’s a neanderthal boy who’s a foot shorter than his peers and his tribe is legendary for feats of strength and are all built like The Rock. Akiya’s more the Woody Allen type. His older brother and friends constantly tease him for not being able to pack very much dead game (you had this problem too?) to the point that Akiya is getting a complex about helping the women gather nuts and dates rather than going out with the men.

Akiya’s back is against the wall. His tribe’s counting on him to transport deer to a neighboring tribe. His dad’s counting on him not to be an embarrassment. His brother and friends won’t help him because they’re more interested in the lifestyle portrayed by new arrivals, music television evangelists. So getting slain deer home is all on Akiya’s shoulders.

How does your worst day compare with Akiya’s?

What do you think Akiya should do?

To check your answers and be entertained, go download Caveman Funk to your Kindle for less than the cost of a latte.